Swords and Spaceships

Ah, yes. The birth of the handheld video game system. Who didn't covet this thing when it came out in the late 80s? I remember wanting one badly (I wouldn't get one until 1997 when the Game Boy Pocket came out and I paid for it with my own money.) It was initially packed with Tetris, a game that was lighting the world on fire at the time. I got the NES version, and got hooked on it like everyone else. I think that Star Trek: TNG episode "The Most Dangerous Game" was inspired by Tetris, but I digress. Those lucky little bastards who got this thing for Christmas loved to brag about it. Meanwhile, I got GI Joes. Seems fair, eh? There are hundreds of games available to suit every taste, and pretty much all of them can be played on the Game Boy Advance SP, which is awesome. (Game Boy Micro can play Advance SP games, but can't play any games from previous generations.) I remember bumming my friend's Game Boy for a trip once. I was playing Super Mario Land, and I bec...

I spent a shitload of money today. I bought a reissue Galvatron and a vintage Soundwave. Expect a review of Galvatron (with pictures this time) and a collection pic of all my beautifully expensive TFs all together. And I'm debating whether or not to spend the rest of my money on a Rodimus Prime reissue. I also bought a couple Serenity figures and some DTC Joes, so they might get a review. Someone needs to give some free press to the Serenity stuff, right? ;) Oh yeah, to those few of you who read this: I'm looking for a Decepticon themed banner for this site. So if you don't mind being rewarded for a couple hours of work with a free MOC Marvel Legends Phoenix, I'd sure appreciate your help. Just make sure it has Soundwave, Megatron/Galvatron (or both), Starscream, and Devastator in it, plus the site's name. Big props if you use the art found on the Hasbro boxes from the 80's. I'd prefer jpg, since that is easily hosted. LMK at bkral1@hotmail.com Thanks!

You know, sometimes I wish I lived in Japan. Mostly because I would have easier access to Transformers reissues. A photo gallery of the brand-spanking new Galvatron reissue. The first thing I noticed was that it's actually colored like he was in the cartoon. The original G1 version was predominantly white where you now see purple on this reissue. This one also has light-up eyes and sounds, though I've heard the voice is in Japanese. I like that box he comes in too. I was never fond of the white boxes Takara uses for their reissues. I much rather preferred Hasbro's boxes since they looked like the G1 I knew and still love. It must be that stupid grid in the background. I can bring it home for about $90, which isn't too bad considering he's a huge toy, he talks, and he's imported. He's number three on my list of Transformers I have to get: Soundwave Astrotrain Galvatron Rodimus Prime Hound Kup and Wheelie Sideswipe It will definetely have to wait until late Ja...

I finally completed this series tonight by finding the last three I needed- Cyclops, First Appearance Spider-Man, and Angel. I finally got to put together the Sentinel, a part of which comes with every figure in this series. The other figures are Black Panther, Mystique, Omega Red, and Mr. Sinister. The thing is absolutely HUGE. 16" tall, which is big enough to be a believable Sentinel for the 6" scale. It's the highlight of this series, no doubt. I gladly purchased most of this series since I wanted the characters. I really didn't want to buy Panther and Spider-Man. But I did, and I wish I didn't. Panther's right arm came off when I tried to move it. It went right back on, but the shoulder is still stuck. Spider-Man has a screwed-up left leg. The knee peg isn't there, and the lower leg is barely staying on. He's just going to sit in a box anyway, so it doesn't matter. I'm a little disappointed about Panther's shoulder being stuck, since it...

No, it's not a review, since I don't own one. But it's on Hasbro's own website for sale right now. If only I had the $25 for it. I think this is an excellent way to continue the G1 reissues since Toys R' Us killed them with the too-high prices. Granted, $25 for Astrotrain isn't a great price. The mold was paid for twenty years ago, so really the only reason it should be expensive is the limited production run, but seriously, they made plenty. Or maybe these are just leftover Takara stock since Astrotrain is still one of the easiest reissues to obtain. Hopefully Hasbro decides to offer Sideswipe and Soundwave this way, since Soundwave is more than due for a US reissue, and Sideswipe is showing up at KBs nationwide, at least the ones that are left. I'm looking for a Sideswipe if anyone wants to hook me up.

I'm going to say it right now: This thing never stood a chance, and it rightly didn't deserve one either. This was Nintendo's 32-bit system, aka a "stopgap" between the Super NES and the Nintendo 64. It was also an attempt to capitalize on the supposedly huge nationwide interest in 'virtual reality'. The premise was intriguing enough, especially if you read Nintendo Power in 1994-95. The screenshots in every issue looked awesome, even if they were totally red. I'm not sure how it works exactly, but I'm sure it involves mirrors and little 2-inch tall men inside. Nintendo deemed it too expensive to use blue and green LEDs (I think) in the VB, and just stuck with red. Which really wasn't that big of a deal until you took your head away from the VB unit and the colors were all dull. Speaking of health hazards associated with the Virtual Boy, let's start with the fact no one under 7 years of age could use it, since it could permanently damage th...

I guess it's for some show they'll eventually do. Linkage. I voted for: He-Man and the Masters of the Universe GI Joe Nintendo Transformers Slime water guns Star Wars action figures Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles You can choose up to 20. Vote now. Yeah.

I want one, badly. It's $50, but it'd be the last 12" Luke I'd ever have to buy. Sideshow does awesome work. I have the Buffy Summers figure they did a year or two ago, and I was really impressed with it. I bet the Star Wars line will be even better. I can't wait till they get to Vader, Maul, the Fetts, and the Stormtrooper. Though if I understand correctly, the first 8 or 9 figures will be all Jedi. Which isn't all that bad, really. A decent 12" Mace Windu is something I've been waiting six years for. I wonder if Yoda will be a stand-alone figure. I suppose they could just pack in his Council chair and maybe a backpack for Luke to carry him on his back. He'd probably need swappable heads for that, and I'm sure Sideshow would rather just do two different figures. Anywho, I'm going to go figure out a way to afford this thing. Peace.

linky. Wow. All that neat stuff, all at your fingertips. If it was twenty years ago, that is. The USS Flagg, Killer WHALE hovercraft, the Crimson Tanks, the Moray Hydrofoil, Transformers of every shape and size (and not the crappy plastic ones that Hasbro started selling in 1986 because they didn't want to use die-cast anymore), and the Gobots and Voltron also make an appearance. It's too bad I can't read Soundwave's 1985 price, though I'll go out on a limb and say it's a hell of a lot cheaper than it would be to buy him now. Seeing this almost makes me wish I'd have won that $340 million jackpot a couple weeks back. Fuck a Ferrari-- I want Transformers.

You remember this one, don't you? Basically, you're a kid aged 17 named Little Mac (your mother hated you) who has no business stepping into the ring with some of these guys. Some are in your weight class. Most are not. Granted, I don't know a hell of a whole lot about boxing, but I'm sure a guy like Bald Bull could have knocked Mac's head clean off his shoulders and onto some lady's lap with a good right hook. Speaking of Bald Bull, weren't the 1980s such a simpler time? An 8-bit package of stereotypes was this game. A weak Frenchman, a Russian with red skin, and a sneaky German, plus other stereotypes. I'll bet you a dollar you couldn't get away with that now. But hey, Nintendo games had lots of crazy shit like that born out of the Cold War. Rush'n Attack, anyone? First you fought Glass Joe. If you blew it on this guy, you sucked and had no business holding an NES controller in your hands. You were better off playing Sorry! Von Kaiser was next...

"yes you are, you'll be stone dead in a moment!" Yeah, I know. Eleven days, no update. On the intarweb, that's like, eleven years. This weekend will see a new update, either about Buffy the Vampire Slayer's first three seasons or a review of Mike Tyson's Punch-Out. I'd use the exclamation points that are supposed to be there, but I don't feel like it. I noticed something on the Blogger Dashboard about using some space here for Google ads. You, my faithful readers (all five who have visited about 46 times each) will never have to see them on this page. I started this to fill the need for a retro site WITHOUT ads all over the main page, and they'll never have a spot here unless Blogger forces them on it. My word is solid. Unless they start paying $10 per click. :)

Here it is- my favorite early KISS album. I like it better than pretty much any other KISS album. The sound quality isn't the greatest, but I think it was recorded this way in an attempt to capture KISS' live sound, short of doing a live album (which they wouldn't do until the next year.) There's a great 1-2-3 punch of songs that just floor me everytime- Parasite, Goin' Blind, and Hotter Than Hell. I like the rest of the songs too, though All The Way and Mainline seem like filler that slightly weigh the album down. The album is all around heavy, heavier than the album before it, and was the heaviest until Rock and Roll Over came out in 1976. (Then they went on to make a couple of really f'n heavy albums in 1982 with Creatures of the Night and in 1992 with Revenge.) My favorite track on the album has to be the Ace Frehley-penned Parasite. As great as it is on this album, it's even better on Alive! I suggest checking both versions out and deciding for yourself...

Thanks to Darby for posting this link. http://www.spaceinvaders.de/play.html I remember walking up to the store my aunt worked in to play the video games there (remember when convenience stores had arcade games in them that didn't involve gambling? Great times, those 1980s) It pissed my mom off, but hey, what the hell, right? They had this one and another one that I can't remember, but thought it was cool because it talked. (It was 1986. That was cool as all hell.) There's an arcade that's supposed to open in the local mall before Christmas. I only hope they have some classics like TMNT and X-Men (you know, the game with TWO screens in it that you likely blew your week's allowance on in one hour) and maybe some old Atari stuff like the Star Wars games. But it will likely be some boring shit that makes you realize why arcades went out of style in the first place. I'll probably be one of the oldest people in that place, but then again, if I cared what people thoug...

A friend from JD writes in with this great essay. Take it away, my good man.... When I was growing up, the predatory behemoth known across the land as Wal-Mart was a rarity. Sure, they still existed here and there, but the Cult of Sam’s presence and influence was nowhere near as what it is today. In the pre-Walton days of retail, there were many smaller department store chains for your varied shopping needs. Not necessarily “mom and pop” stores, the smaller chains that found their business confined to a particular geographic area, such as Children’s Palace, Rose’s, Magic Mart, and Hills, were often the only place to find the hottest action figures or the coolest vehicles for people. These small retailers were even more important to kids living in a rural or isolated area, such as myself, and that’s where my story begins. When I was a kid, I had to work for my allowance, which might come as a shock to the children of today, with their parent-supplied cell phone...

I'm going to break from the norm here and talk about a problem collectors are having now. It's distribution of product, or lack thereof. Let me take, for example, the Star Wars line. Right now, I am currently lacking 8 figures and two special sets, them being the Sith Evolutions and Jedi Temple Assault sets. And I just heard today that six more figures have been spotted. I've never been this far behind on the Star Wars line, and it's not for lack of money, it's because the products simply aren't there. If I want the item bad enough, I usually set aside money for it. But this stuff I just can't find. I was having a conversation with someone from JediDefender, and I hope he doesn't mind, but I'm going to copy and paste a little snippet of what he wrote, since it sums up exactly what the problem is in better words than I could. ....I was referring to the fact that finding a figure or vehicle wasn't anywhere near as complicated back then as it seems ...

I feel this is the best Mega Man game for the NES. Just like the two previous installments, you go through every stage, collecting power-ups like energy tanks and free lives. Eventually, after you've gotten through the hair-raising obstacles in each stage, you face the boss. After defeating him, you take his weapon and use it against other bosses. Even the strongest boss can be defeated in a few hits with the right weapon. Here are the bosses. I usually beat them in this order: Magnet Man, Hard Man (tee hee!), Needle Man, Snake Man, Top Man, Shadow Man, Spark Man, and Gemini Man. I take on Needle Man early so I can get Rush Jet, which saves my ass a lot. Once you have beaten these dorks, you then get to face the Doc Robots. The four hardest stages (Spark, Gemini, Needle, and Shadow) are made even harder and lengthened considerably. In these stages, you get to face two robots each stage who have the powers of the robot bosses from Mega Man 2. You don't get to keep their powers, ...

This game sucked. I guess Ultra knew kids in America would go ga-ga over anything with the TMNT name/logo on it, and while they were right, it still doesn't excuse this unbeatable pile of shit. Some people can't get past the part where you diffuse the bombs at the dam, and others still can't get past that part where you're driving around in the Turtle Van (as of the last time I played, I am one of those people.) You have four lives- one for each Turtle- Leonardo, Michelangelo, Raphael, and Donatello. You had a chance to rescue your 'captured' bros later in the game, but since I've been that far about once, it's almost pointless unless you're really good at this game. The only Turtle that was really worth a fuck was Leonardo since has weapon had good range and was quick. Donatello is worthy too. His weapon is powerful, has the best range, but it's slow. I rarely play as Raphael or Michelangelo, since their weapons are just terrible, Mike's bei...

I'll admit- I still bought these even when it was socially unacceptable for someone my age to be buying them (but I now collect a lot more- funny, huh?) Playmates launched this line in 1992 to capitalize on the show's massive popularity. Star Trek had never done well in the toy form, so it was a big gamble that paid off huge. The company also had the foresight to market them to both children and collectors, though some will say they were marketed more towards the older crowd. I mean, they individaully numbered the figures, for chrissakes. (Actually, they just numbered the feet, but, whatever.) I started buying them in 1993, when most of the command crew was hard to find. Especially Troi. My first figures were Q, Klingon Warrior Worf (in his Klingon armor), Geordi LaForge in dress uniform, and Locutus. I got them out of a JC Penney catalog, and was instantly hooked. Target was the store of choice to get these. I scored a Data there, plus a couple Deep Space Nine figures. Then th...

I'm looking for a complete ROB. And the compatible games for it, Gyromite and Stack Up. If you can help me out, LMK. I remember seeing this thing in action at a Toys R' Us in 1988, before I got my NES. I thought it was awesome that you got a freakin' robot with a game system. To a seven year old, that's the coolest thing ever. YOUR OWN FUCKING ROBOT!!!! Well, when I received my NES for Christmas that year, there was no robot in the box. Instead, there was a two-tone gray gun called the Zapper. Where the hell was my robot? Turns out the thing wasn't bundled with the NES very long, in fact, that one I saw in that Toys R Us was an example that had been sitting around for a couple years. I heard ol' ROB kind of sucked anyway, and since his presence in the bundle almost doubled the price, he was dropped in favor of the Zapper, and later, the stupid Power Pad (that stupid vinyl thing that sat on the floor and you could play Track & Field on it. Bet you'll neve...

I loved He-Man and the MOTU as a kid. I had lots of the toys, including Castle Grayskull, Snake Mountain, and the one toy that pissed off mothers everywhere, the Slime Pit. Most of them managed to survive my childhood, though a lot of them are missing their weapons and other accessories. Still have the castles too, though they're missing a lot of damn parts, and getting replacement parts is too expensive. I also bought the Commemorative Series Mattel did in 2000/2001, which are the favorite pieces in my collection. Then I also bought most of the new line Mattel had going from 2002 to 2004, before they fucked the whole thing up. Now they're doing $20 statues of characters that should have been $7 action figures. Like a sucker, I bought the three that are currently available- Hordak, Clawful, and Snout Spout. There's also a con exclusive of King Randor, but I hate exclusives with a passion, and I didn't have the fifty bucks they were going for on ebay, so I didn't bot...

So this is what Reagan's America was like. It involved a group of specialists from different branches of the military fighting an evil terrorist menace called Cobra. Though you'd think that with Cobra's incompetence at every turn, the Joe team would have kicked their asses in but two encounters. But Cobra seemed to be proficient in escaping to fight another day, which is why the comic book ran to 150 or so issue and the toyline continued for 13 years. Speaking of the toyline, who didn't love it? Awesome figures, imaginative vehicles, huge playsets- this line had it all. I never had the really cool vehicles like the Flagg, the Defiant, or the Terrordrome, but I knew kids who did. I think my favorite vehicle that I didn't have was the Moray Hydrofoil. I didn't get one until this summer, and only then a poorly-painted version of it. But it's neat to finally have one. My favorite vehicles I had were: They were all well-used and loved. I still have them all, they...

I love this book. I didn't start reading until the late 90's and started with the trade paperbacks. I loved the whole concept of the book: A soldier named Al Simmons is betrayed and killed by his comrades. He is sent to Hell since he's a trained killer (later on in the series we'd discover that Heaven and Hell take turns picking souls for Armageddon, and some people that should have gone to Hell are in fact in Heaven) and he cuts a deal with Malebolgia to return to Earth to see his wife again. What Al doesn't know is that five years have passed. His wife is remarried to his best friend and they have a child together. To make matters worse, underneath his costume, he is something that isn't human anymore. And there's a lot of people and creatures on both sides who want him dead. My personal favorite of these early issues is issue #5. In this issue, a convicted child molester and murderer named Billy Kincaid gets set free (let's hear it for justice!) and ...

Who hasn't played this game? Who can't remember the code? Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Start. (I did that from memory.) If you didn't use that code, chances are you had your ass handed to you by stage four. If you were able to beat it without using the code, you were either lying or spent too much time playing games. Back in the day, I didn't care that I couldn't beat the game. I just had fun blowing away gun turrets and unarmed guys who could jump really high. I loved the Spread gun, though I'll use the Laser if I find it. And you have to love Nintendo Logic. A great alien menace lands on Earth (New Zealand, I've heard) and hires a bunch of humans to protect them. And what is the world's response? Two ripped guys who like big guns and don't like shirts go in and blow everything to holy hell. The guys are apparently really good gymnasts too. And their pants are to die for. I think they thought up the alien BS when they ran out ...

Oh yeah. This game came out in 1991, the height of the anthropomorphic-animals-kicking-each-other's-asses craze. I remember riding my bike down to the local video library trying to get my hands on this game. It took a month before it happened. When I got it home, I popped it in my NES (it still worked very well back then.) The first two stages were easy. The Turbo Tunnel, however, was a complete bitch. It wasn't until a few years ago that I played it again after purchasing it at a video game store. Then I couldn't get past the surfing stage. Bleh. I still haven't beat it yet, but I'm trying. The frustration factor of this game in like an 11 on a scale that stops at 10. But it's still fun to play, like most challenging NES games. You keep thinking there's stuff you haven't seen yet, so that keeps you going. Plus trying out different strategies to get over obstacles until you run out of lives. There were a few sequels to it that I don't own, even thoug...

Yeah, this show was kind of a crapfest, and now you can see for yourself by checking out this link. They have an episode of Mario Bros. and lower on the menu, there's an episode of the Legend of Zelda.

Ah, yes. This thing. The thing that ruined a square foot of my parent's carpet. No matter how careful you were, you still got Slime all over hell. Sooner or later your cousins (or younger brothers) would get ahold of it and what little Slime you had left, and they'd ruin your Grizzlor and Moss Man figures with it. They couldn't Slime He-Man or Tri-Klops, they had to wreck the guys with hair. I remember getting this thing at Target after saving my allowance. My mother was a little worried about it, but I got it anyway. (I think she kind of regretted that a few weeks later.) Within a month, I had used up two cans of Slime, and their wasn't any way in hell I was going to get more, since my mom wouldn't buy it and forbade me to buy it. Eventually I got Snake Mountain, and pretty much stopped worrying about Slime for this thing since I had a strong imagination, plus my attention was on my new castle that FUCKING TALKED, man. And I didn't want my younger brothers to g...

This is one of greatest games ever. If not THE greatest game ever. You probably remember seeing it first in either "The Wizard" or the pages of Nintendo Power. I, for one, have never sat through "The Wizard", but I had heard from my friends who saw it at the time raving about that sequence where the game is in full action. (And yet, there was always that one weird kid who went on and on about the Power Glove.) I received this game for Christmas 1990, along with thousands of other kids that year. I also received the Strategy Guide for it. I remember poring over the game with the guide, and being slightly annoyed when I'd pick a box in the Mushroom House that was supposed to contain a fire flower but had a mushroom instead. I didn't get very far for a while. I managed to get to world 5 without warping, but I always ran out of lives on Roy Koopa's Doom Ship. But after a while, I got better and managed to beat the game within a year. Which was pretty good fo...

Here we go! This blog is open to everyone who wants to contribute. It's going to be about pop culture stuff from the 1970s through 1990s. Kind of like Vh1's I Love The __'s. So, in order to get this thing going, I'll need submissions from other people. I don't care about length so long as you don't care that you won't get any money for your work. I'll do free plugs for your blog, website, or both. I'm thinking aroung 2-3 pics per article to illustrate your point, but hey, that's always negotiable. I mostly want to stick to TV, movies, music, video games, toys, comics, and the like. But pretty much everything is wide open because I'm not too fond of a narrow focus. Hell, submit something about your Bravestarr pajamas you had in 1988. Submissions covering a topic that has been done before are welcome (and encouraged too!) Yes, I know you've seen sites like this before, but the ones I've visited are too full of ads or have such poor gram...